


Vulnerability

by Kalua



Category: Servamp (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Bittersweet, Loneliness, M/M, Vulnerability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-16 01:46:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29942622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalua/pseuds/Kalua
Summary: Sometimes when you're hurting, all you want to do is withdraw and shut yourself off from the world.But other times, when it feels like the loneliness is about to tear your soul asunder, you crave company so much, you stop caring whose company it is you're accepting. Today was one of those days for Mikuni.And every now and then, that's not a bad decision to make.
Relationships: Arisuin Mikuni/Jeje | Doubt Doubt
Kudos: 11





	Vulnerability

Jeje had tried to apologize more than once.

“You have no right to be sorry,” Mikuni had shot him down at first.

“Whaaat, you’re _still_ hung up on that?” he’d said later, but still hadn’t accepted the apology.

“Stop it,” had been the answer the last time Jeje had tried, and he’d obeyed.

Perhaps his failed apologies had only made things worse; words were not Jeje’s strong suit, though he suspected even the most silver-tongued of his siblings would have a hard time apologizing for a sin this severe.

So instead, Jeje tried to make up for it in other ways. He followed Mikuni’s orders, allowed him to mess with his bags, anything he could think of to _show_ he was sorry. So far, to no avail.

“Jeje.”

Mikuni’s voice, albeit quiet, easily reached Jeje. He transformed into a snake and slithered through the nearest hole into Mikuni’s room.

Mikuni was lying on the bed, his face covered with his hat. For a split second, Jeje feared his influence might finally have started to corrupt Mikuni, too, like his mother before him, though neither her nor any of his precious Eves had adopted his dislike for showing his face.

Mikuni held out his left arm. “Drink my blood.”

Jeje, back in his human form, approached him warily. “Are you… serious?” It wouldn’t be the first time Mikuni had promised him blood, only to refuse giving it once Jeje had done what Mikuni asked of him.

“Yeah.” Mikuni lifted his hat a little, allowing Jeje to glimpse a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

After this long without drinking his blood, it was hard for Jeje to tell how Mikuni was feeling. Sad, maybe, or tired?

Jeje knelt down beside Mikuni, still expecting him to yank his arm away at the last second. But he didn’t. Mikuni held perfectly still while Jeje lowered his head, and finally sank his teeth into Mikuni’s wrist.

Loneliness.

That was what Mikuni was feeling. A loneliness so strong Mikuni was willing to accept the company and comfort of a vampire, of _Jeje_ , as long as that eased his loneliness even a little bit.

It wasn’t the only thing Mikuni was feeling—human emotions were rarely that simple—but its bitter taste overshadowed nearly everything else.

A strong dose of regret was mixed in as well, though; even Jeje could guess it was about being spotted by Misono, wrecking their bond when it had just barely started to be mended.

Jeje let go and glanced at Mikuni. He was lying still, only his chest rose and fell with every breath.

A few seconds passed before Mikuni withdrew his arm and placed the hand underneath his head. A single drop of blood fell from the bite wound, leaving a small red stain on the white sheets.

The stillness felt strange; Mikuni was rarely quiet for long, couldn’t bear long stretches of silence well. But even if Jeje had wanted to break it, he wouldn’t know how.

So in the end, it was Mikuni who spoke again first.

“So, Jeje~” Mikuni said, trying but not quite managing to match his usual playful tone. “Why do you always hide your face like that?”

Jeje took a moment to look Mikuni over before he replied. “You don’t really… show yourself, either.”

“Ehhh?” Mikuni sat up to make a show of tugging at his clothes and touching his face as if looking for a paper bag. “I show way more than you do, though~ Have you been spending too much time with Snow Lily?”

Jeje shook his head. “Your mask is on the inside.”

Mikuni fell silent again, and Jeje could feel that his words had struck a nerve; it was almost surreal how much stronger Jeje could sense Mikuni’s emotions now. And the last thing Mikuni wanted was for anyone, even his closest allies, to know he wasn’t the happy-go-lucky person he pretended to be—or, even worse, for anyone to glimpse behind the façade.

Jeje sat down on the floor, his back leaned against the bed frame, and took a deep breath. Slowly, he removed the top-most paper bag, then the middle one, gently setting them down next to him.

“Huh? Jeje?” Mikuni’s curiosity was sparked, but Jeje couldn’t face him yet.

Even more slowly than before, Jeje grabbed his last paper bag and lifted it, baring first his mouth, then his nose, and finally his eyes before he set it down beside the others. If this were any other situation, Mikuni would’ve probably grabbed his shoulders to turn him around, or circled him to see Jeje’s face sooner. Then again, in any other situation, Jeje would not have removed his bags at all.

As things were, Jeje could allow himself to pause for a moment before he finally turned around to Mikuni.

Mikuni’s eyes went wide for a second, but soon returned to normal as he studied Jeje’s face.

Jeje clenched his fists and fought down the reflex to duck out of sight or turn into a snake. If Mikuni let him see behind his mask, he deserved the same from Jeje.

After a few sheer endless seconds, Mikuni spoke again. “I don’t get it.”

Jeje tilted his head to the side.

“Why you’re hiding, I mean.”

“I don’t know, either,” Jeje answered, then shook his head. “I don’t remember,” he corrected himself. It was probably something from his time as a human, but the memories from back then were hazy at best, and completely gone at worst.

“Huh.” Mikuni idly fidgeted with his hat, then set it atop Jeje’s head and pulled it down deep into his face. It didn’t cover as much as the bag, but felt far more comfortable than nothing. “Better?”

Jeje didn’t need to see Mikuni to know he was grinning. “Yeah.”

They were silent for a few seconds.

“You know, Jeje,” Mikuni continued, his voice more serious again. “I still can’t forgive you.”

“I know.” How could he? Jeje had ripped Mikuni’s family apart twice. It was only natural that Mikuni wouldn’t forgive that.

And yet, hearing him say it still hurt.

“But.”

Jeje carefully moved the hat to free one of his eyes. It felt uncomfortable—too exposed—but he wanted to be able to look at Mikuni. ‘But’ what?

Mikuni twirled one of his braids between his dingers. “But… I’m still glad you’re here.” He let go of his braid and met Jeje’s gaze.

It took Jeje a moment to parse the emotion he sensed from Mikuni, vastly different from the brotherly affection he felt for Misono or the distanced appreciation he had for companions he’d fought side by side with. And, perhaps for the first time in years, Jeje saw a genuine smile on Mikuni’s face.

Mikuni let himself fall back onto his pillow, looking up at the ceiling, and Jeje turned away again—though he kept wearing Mikuni’s hat instead of switching back to his bags.

Jeje couldn’t have said how long they stayed like that, unmoving, the only sound Mikuni’s soft breathing. It might have been only minutes, but it might have been hours, too.

Finally, Mikuni stretched and sat back up, turning to his doll. “Time for dinner, don’t you think, Abel-chan?”

He jumped out of the bed—and paused right next to Jeje. For a second, it seemed like he was about to bend down, but then he just kept walking.

“Wait.” Jeje quickly got back to his feet, while Mikuni turned around.

Jeje crossed the distance with a single step. He took the hat off, peering down into Mikuni’s golden eyes; the sensation sent shivers down his spine. “May I?”

He didn’t have to specify what he meant; Mikuni smirked, but the feeling Jeje sensed from him was more akin to relief. “When did you get so bold, Jeje?” Mikuni teased and nodded, a movement far smaller and shakier than his words would give reason to expect.

Jeje leaned down, keeping eye contact with Mikuni for as long as possible, and closed his eyes when their lips finally touched. Mikuni leaned into it just a little bit, the pressure between them light as the touch of a feather. Jeje allowed himself to cradle the back of Mikuni’s head with his free hand, while Mikuni laid his hands on Jeje’s hips.

They locked eyes again after they drew back. “So,” Mikuni said, grinning, “Let’s get dinner.”

Jeje nodded and placed the hat back on Mikuni’s head before he transformed into a snake and took his usual sport around Mikuni’s neck. Somehow, it felt warmer—more welcoming—than it had before.

**Author's Note:**

> Someone save my multishipping ass, _there are so many good ships in Servamp!_  
>  I'm not sure if I'd necessarily call ANY of the other Servamps "silver-tongued" (Maybe Lily? Hyde is good at quoting Shakespeare but I'm not sure if I'd call him silver-tongued lmao), but they sure are better with words than our snek man.  
> Also pls give Mikuni and Jeje some hugs. They need to know I care them ;-;


End file.
